A little tip for your labor, but not only: Try – a word to delete from your vocabulary
Updated: May 19, 2021
The way our mind works is quite amazing. We all may know about conscious and unconscious mind, yet to define where one stops and the other begins is not something one can simply do.. The lines are blur, and sometimes there is no point to draw those lines at all..
When I joined the HypnoBirthing Practitioner training I also did introduction to hypnosis, as part of the certification. We spent some time on analyzing conscious and unconscious mind, looked at brain wave frequencies, laws of mind and thought that affect change.. It was also an eye opener.. Learning about the mind brought some clarity on why I did some things in the past one way, and not the other.
It was 2007, I started my first real job, out of all places in Singapore. I got assigned to a new team, with a manager who came out of consulting company. It was an experience. I spent a year in Asia before going back to Europe, but it felt like at least a good number of years. Every day was a lesson. One of the things that stuck in my head was what Barbara used to ask me every time I said I would try to do something, ‘So will you try to do it, or actually do it?’.
I took this attitude with me afterwards, but only when joining the HypnoBirthing Practitioner training, where we analyzed our conscious and unconscious mind, I realized how true were Barbara’s words. Our unconscious mind doesn’t understand the word ‘try’. There is this exercise that we do in every first class of our HypnoBirthing course. It is called pen dropping. We ask our parents to hold a pen, focus strongly on this pen, and try to drop it. It’s a short exercise, yet it takes quite a few repetitions of a request to try to drop the pen for parents to actually drop the pen, and that also mostly happen when I drop my pen first, and parents are triggered to do the same..
When it comes to birthing we are looking for the same approach. You don’t want to try to have a joyful birthing experience, you want to have a joyful birthing experience, don’t you? That’s why it’s so important that we have that right attitude from the very beginning. Drop the doubts and fears, forget about what people told you that happened to their friends, sisters, cousins, or aunties. Focus on what you want and imprint it in your mind, so that when you are in labor, you are that person that you want to be – strong, calm, empowered and in control.
And while changing this attitude towards your birthing experience, you may just realize that when applying it also to other areas of your life, will bring quite an impact. Trying something implies a possibility that what we are aiming for, may not actually happen as we would wish for. So why not just doing it? It doesn’t hurt giving it a shot, and you may just discover that ‘If you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything’ ;)